©2005 original russian text here
©2005 Translated by Boris

POEM ABOUT LEGAL SOFT

God above is always watching,
Monitoring all computers...
I've just purchased mighty Lunix
in a shiny retails box.

Envy me, you sorry loser!
I'm mighty power user.
Lunix always was freeware,
and from now on it rules.

No longer should I care
or to give a rat's ass
for all your urgent patches
for the stolen Windows crap.

I will never download
Gigabytes of service packs.
And for all the macroviruses
I won't give a flying fuck!

I won't care about the Office
and the rest of MS crap.
Fellows! Theft is no joke,
it's a felony and sin!

I've been a bitch and a whore,
But today, be God my witness,
I have burnt illegal disk
in my trusty microwave.

It was burning for some minutes,
making sparks and nasty smoke...
If its hole were a bit bigger,
I would put it on my cock!

Why don't we all agree
that it is a fucking shame
to Google serial numbers
for the copyrighted soft?

Don't you feel like wasted condom,
don't you feel like a crack whore,
when you use a stolen Windows
in your office and at home?

You can't steal the freebie Lunix,
which is all the true freeware--
you can use whatever found,
just install and say "Fuck off!".

Try to search a Windows user,
always has he something stolen -
something little, something puny,
some plugin or other shit.

Tell him straight, "You sore loser,
where is you Windows license?
Have you paid for all the goodies
stored all over your hard drive?"

Why would Indian programmers,
hungry and in tattered clothes,
write all this fucking code?
Fuck you, go and buy your soft!

Why, the hell, in tiny shack
would a poor Chinese hack
spend all days besides his comp?
Where's money, you asshole?

When the boss' erected penis
covered walls in charts and graphs,
did this mean that you, a dick,
shouldn't pay a ruble back?

You may sell your hand or kidney,
you may sell your last T-shirt,
but you should never, never, never
steal anything from Microsoft!

© original russian text here
© Translated by Boris

© Leonid Kaganov:    lleo@aha.ru
Official Site:     http://lleo.aha.ru/e